Feng Shui in the Bedroom: Romancing the Bagua

If one of your goals for 2000 is to call a partner into your life or to enhance a partnership that is already existing but seems to be lacking the thrill it used to have, the best room in your home in which to make some adjustments is your master bedroom. This is true whether your master bedroom is in the Partnership corner of your house or not. The master bedroom represents a primary relationship no matter where it’s located. Anytime there are relationship issues, particularly personal relationships, it is important to keep the bedroom in order and in a balanced and harmonious state.

One way to bring harmony into a bedroom is to incorporate as many round and/or oval The Basic Baguashapes as possible. This could be a round or oval picture above the bed or a picture with round flower-like shapes in it. It could mean having some round night-stands or some small round pillows on the bed. The feelings of harmony could also be accomplished with a round or oval rug. Upholstery fabric, wallpaper, bedspread patterns or curtain patterns could incorporate some soft circular shapes. If some of the furniture can be placed at an angle in the corners of the room, this brings a more circular flow rather than having all the furniture straight up against the walls.

Using pairs of items emphasizes the idea of a couple—pairs of candles, two chairs, two decorative pillows, two matching potted plants. Seeing this “two-ness” reflected in the bedroom emphasizes the idea of intimacy and harmony with another person. It is also imperative that the room reflect both aspects of a relationship: male and female, yin and yang. If there’s too much yin or female energy, the person who holds the yang energy in the relationship may feel uncomfortable. Pink lace curtains, flowered wallpaper motif complemented by small wicker furniture may appeal to the female part of the relationship but repulses the male aspect. Likewise an unbalance of yang energy results in the same outcome. A bedroom with oversized furniture, wildlife prints on each of the walls and a stuffed moose-head positioned right about the gun cabinet would be out of balance. This male-female (yin-yang) balance is important even for same-sex relationships.

A bedroom must speak to romance whether you’re romancing another person or yourself. “Romance” means different things to different people. To some people romance means flowers—to others it’s the use of candles—some people think of rocking chairs—sometimes a particular color conjures up romantic ideas. Whatever it means to you, you need to have some element of it in your bedroom. If you’re already involved with a partner, your idea of “romance” should coincide with your partner’s idea of “romance.” If you bring in flowers because they make you feel lavish and special but your partner is allergic to flowers, then another avenue needs to be explored so that both of you experience a feeling of romance.

If you’re trying to call in a partner make sure that your current space has room for another person. Despite the objections I often hear that, if another person were to come into someone’s life, they would move together into a different place, there is still a very overt message to a prospective partner if you have no room for them in your current space. This overcrowded condition doesn’t just mean that there’s no room physically, but that there’s no room emotionally as well.

You can ask yourself if there would be any room in your closet for someone else’s clothes. In order to make room, it may require you to simplify your closet dramatically. Even if, in the end, there was not enough closet space for someone else, the intention is that you have cleared some old things out and made room for another person. When a new partner moves into another partner’s home, there’s a critical blending that needs to happen or the new partner will forever feel like a visitor.

Be mindful of where you place your clothes hamper and your wastebasket in your master bedroom. You don’t want to be “hampered” in any way or feel like your relationships are being “recycled” more than you like. Remove any dried flowers in the master bedroom since they are “dead” and cannot help to promote a blossoming and vital relationships. You do not want to have your bedroom overrun with stuffed animals depicting your childhood preferences. You do not want to be a child in your bedroom. Likewise having a picture of yourself as a baby or as a little kid in your bedroom also conjures up memories of you as a child. Having pictures of just about anyone in your bedroom can set up some hesitations when inviting in a partner—hanging pictures of your own children or of your parents can certainly make you feel self-conscious.

Your bedroom is meant to be just that—a room for your bed. It’s not a workout space, a place of business or an entertainment hub. Your bedroom is for two things: sleep and intimacy. Anything that speaks to other activities needs to find a new “home” or at least be screened off at night so it’s impact isn’t as direct. This is personal space. No one else comes into your room except by your invitation. If your bedroom is just off the living room, you need to keep the door closed to prevent peering eyes from violating your private space. Now is the time you can begin to call in the passion you want and begin to realize your heart’s desires by working some Feng Shui into your bedroom!